Skills for Life - Creating Good Habits

It is very important to start instilling into your child good habits such as good manners (whether its at the table or socialy), keeping the body clean and using the toilet correctly, etc. When starting at a young age it gives them loads of time to practice so that it may eventually become a habit. Therefore when they reach age 8 (the age when they should start making salaah) the good practices are already embedded in their everyday lifestyle.

However, when teaching your children the good practices of using the toilet correctly or when cleansing themselves parents must make it their duty to continualy check that they have done it properly. Do not assume that if you told them once or twice that now they will start doing it on their own because sometimes they are having such a good time playing that when they need the toilet they will sometimes forget to clean themselves because they want to go back to playing immediately :)...believe me I have 22 nieces and nephews and I have seen it :). I know it sounds like a tiring job but it will be the best for the child.

While teaching your child these good practices also emphasise how important cleanliness is in Islam and how it is linked with everything else like making salaah, reading the Qur'an, etc. Tell them how much Allah likes us to keep ourselves nice and clean.

The key to Jannah is the salaah and the key to salaah is cleanliness.

With regards to the table manners or social manners like respect to other people or saying your P's or Q's parents should not take it lightly. Good manners is part and parcel of being a good Muslim. Every Muslim is an ambassador for Islam and through our good mannerisms and conduct we invite people to Islam....everybody looks up to people with good manners.

When a child is showing ill table or social manners he/she must be reprimanded. "Empty threats" should not be made but carried through. Our children are much more smart than what we think. A parent makes a threat and the child doesnt take it seriously because he knows that his parent won't do anything and he does it over and over again.

Because of how much we love our children we don't really want to scold or reprimand them but to discipline them is very important. We think that by always giving in to our children and not reprimanding them when they do something wrong that that is a sign of love. We are so scared that if we scold our children they are going to love us less. There should be a balance in the love for our children and by throwing in a little discipline we can achieve that.

They cannot yet see the bigger picture. Disciplining them prepares them to be better adults, better husbands and wives and better mothers and fathers and in turn better ambassadors for Islam. Do not raise your children for yourselves but instead raise them for Islam.